A new me.

So I always thought writing is a great stress reliever. I used to have one of these blogs back in the day, but before it seemed so cliche writing about my boyfriend at the time or other silly things I did at the age of 16. So, nine years later I figure I give it another try since I've added years of wisdom and maturity since then.

Consider this entry a first post by the new Nicole. I've always been the type to be in a relationship ever since I was 14 (yes, one could always ask the question: how could a girl at that age possibly even comprehend a relationship? I just did I guess). Silly now that I look back at it. So it's been a while I've been single now after what, 10 years? Might I say it's so refreshing. Sure I'm living life as a 21 year old again staying out late, partying at every opportunity, and the greatest thing of all: meeting people. When you're in a relationship you live in this tiny little bubble that doesn't hardly expand at all. While most of my high school friends are married with children now I can't hardly fathom the idea of being one of them. God bless them and their beautiful families but I can't imagine settling down right now. There's just way too many things I still need to do!

Since being single though, I've had a few flings here and they always end up fading out, except for the last one I had that ended back in May. Sheesh I gotta tell ya, after this one it's a little hard for me to trust guys again. This guy seriously took advantage of me to the max and silly me let him. I should have known better than to get feelings involved. I held my feelings at bay as best I could. I was an awesome friend to him. I helped him move, I let him borrow money - twice. The second time he didn't return it and then I never heard from him again despite my effort in collecting it 2 weeks after. But a good friend once said to me, "We give people the benefit of the doubt and people, even men will sometimes disappoint. Don't worry lesson learned, but don't close the book, just turn the page." It's true. While it was one of the worst experiences I had to date if I can get through my father's death and get over a boy I invested over 4 years with I can certainly get through this. Those are chapters in my book and this is just a page. It's been a short while since it ended but, it's enough to keep me out of the dating scene for now. I'm not looking for anyone at this time and am completely content. Even dating can be dramatic and fortunately I haven't had to deal with any of that. I sleep soundly every night. I guess I'm at a point where I'm completely fed up. I'm tired of meeting these little boys. Now I know what I'm looking for so now I just don't let anyone waste my time.

As for the future I'm almost done with school! Just 3 more classes and that's it! I can taste the ending. It's going to be great. I decided I want to open my own store. So while I can dream about it now as well as research I'll definitely be taking action in the near future. I can't wait! Get ready world....